Thursday, July 02, 2009

Easy....or not?

When I meet someone new and they discover that: a) I've lost a lot of weight; or b) I exercise regularly and eat well, it's not unusual for them to be all "How did you do it?" or "I wish I could get motivated to do that" or something along those lines. Then during the course of the conversation, they find out that I'm a personal trainer, and this comment inevitably follows:

Oh. Well then, it's EASY for you.

Really? Easy for me? Hmm.

Look, I know that what they're really doing with that comment is letting themselves off the hook. There they were, feeling little prickles of discomfort because they know that they should be losing weight themselves, or eating better, or exercising daily. Whatever. But now they can just stay stuck in their comfortable old slothful habits, because they've rolled out the delusional argument that fitness professionals are a separate species to "normal" humans. So it isn't their fault that they don't live up to their own expectations, is it?

Well, let's take a look at the life of the superhuman fitness professional, shall we? Here are a few facts you may not know about us:

1. We all love getting up at the crack of dawn - before dawn is even better. The darker and colder it is, the more we love it. Who likes snuggling under warm blankets anyway?

2. We always feel like training, no matter what. Not enough sleep? Sick? Going through a major personal trauma? Pfft. WE don't care about that stuff, because our superhuman mojo just keeps on going.

3. We don't like to party at all. As for alcohol, who needs it? All sane people should want to be in bed by 8:30pm anyway.

4. We could happily live on nothing but veggies and chicken breasts, with the odd bowl of oats thrown in. Cakes, chocolate, cookies and other sweet treats never tempt us, because we are highly evolved beings who are beyond such unnecessary things. As for pizza, chips, etc - huh! Those aren't even on our radar. Mmm, yummy salads are all we crave in mid-winter.

5. We are totally in tune with our bodies, and never suffer from "fat days". We can look in the mirror and honestly appraise our physiques from a completely objective viewpoint. Of course, this always results in a "God, I'm hot!" verdict, because: see 1-4 above.

6. We have zero psychological issues, and especially never have conversations with numerous inner selves who continually try to drag us off-track. We think nothing but positive thoughts, 100% of the time.

Yep. Super men and women, that's us. Just give up trying right now, y'all - it's futile for you to even bother, ya know. Because it's EASY for us.


Maryanne said...

Love it Kek, so well said!!!

Cherub said...

here here!

Sara said...

I love this post so much I'm going to lazy blog it and live I'm your reflected glory, ok?

Kek said...

Go right ahead, luvvie - lazy blogging rules!

Vix said...

BLOG OF THE WEEK right there!!

It constantly amazes me how my clients seem blown out of the water if I so much as mention that sometimes, God forbid, I actually have to force myself to haul my ass out of bed to the gym!! No Einstein, believe it or not I wasn't actually *born* with an unfaltering desire to spend 3 hours a day slaving away on the gym floor/stepper and eat nothing but egg white omelettes!!

Hmmm I might become a lazy blogger today too!!

Fifi said...

he he..yeah you're a bunch of freaks!...freaks I tell you! LOL!

People will cling to ANYTHING to make themselves feel better...arghh!

Trixie said...

I love this blog entry!!! Yeah,you must make it look easy Kerryn:)

ss2306 said...

Is that a bit of sarcasm I detect? (LOL).

You forgot the fact that we exercise SOOOO much because we train others. For me, most of the time, means standing there barking orders not moving my own arse!

SeLiNa said...


Forget blog of the week, it's blog of the year right there baby!!!!!!!!

I'm soooo going to have to print that out and stick it on the noticeboard for all my clients to see...

Kek said...

Shelley, yes, I did forget that one (thought about it after, but couldn't be bothered editing).

It's an insane idea - if we trained with every one of our clients, what kind of a mess would we be? No recovery, risk of overuse injuries, zero progress from doing too much of everything rather than a program tailored for US.....

I'm more of the barking orders kind too. LOL.

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