Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Finishing strong

2010 has sucked in many ways. Not that there have been any major dramas in my life that I can point to and say "See? No wonder I've had such a battle." It's just been the cumulative effect of a whole lot of stressful situations in 2008-09.

Of course, there was the camel's-back-breaking straw of my Dad's death. That tipped me over the edge and turned me into an anxious, miserable mess. But overall, there were just minor annoyances, upsets and disappointments that seemed to keep on coming, non-stop.

This year was supposed to be all about getting back to normal, but it took me until June before the paralysing anxiety lifted completely and I was even able to begin clawing my way back. From June to September was a little bumpy, and progress was a stop-start affair.

But the past three weeks has seen the return of the old me. Finally. Getting up early to train is once again just what I do, instead of an impossible task. Being positive and determined is the order of the day. And happiness and contentment are more frequent residents inside my head than gloom and pessimism.

So 2010, you can BITE ME. Give it your best shot, throw everything you have at me; I don't care. I'm finishing this year out on a high.


MTB Girl said...

GO KEK! I'm glad the regular you is returning, I've missed her. You can do it, finish the year strong. I'm with you on that one :)

Shar said...

Great Post Kek.
I can't say Ill join yo on the early morning training as I have 'early morning Freddy' that occurs everyday but I will try and join you on the positive attiitude!

Raechelle said...

Good on ya! Choosing to move forward with a positive attitude-good stuff!

Kathryn said...

Well said. You are really inspiring me to get back into it. I've been getting into a 'can't do it any more' attitude but it is just in my head. and maybe a bit in my legs too :)

Andrea said...

That's really interesting about the anxiety Kek. I too had a sever anxiety issue for the first half of the year that I was taking medication for. When I fell pregnant I was no longer able to take the medication which had become a bit of a crutch. I had zero motivation for anything other than activities of basic living during that time and the gym felt like a lifetime away - just another thing to add to the list. No that I have come past the crutch of the medication and the anxiety problem doesn't seem to be as bad, the gym has opened up as a possibility again and I am finding that I am able to go and have plenty of time, when I was adamant before that I didn't have enough time. The brain really does work in strange ways!

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